Wednesday, February 28, 2007

Offset This!

The latest liberal insane inanity...carbon offsets. This brilliant idea provides hypocrites like Algore and Ahhhnold an adroit means of escaping the all-too-obvious double standard they afford themselves when it comes to global climate warming change. It seems to me that we can do offsets for many other unpleasant by-products of humanity. Here are some of my ideas:

Jackass Offsets - Pay someone to say something sensible for every jackass comment you make.

Flatulence Offsets - A spritz of cologne or perfume for every time you stink up your environment.

Booger Offsets - Whenever you pick your nose, something nasty is shoved back up there.

Celebrity-Meltdown Offsets - Spears can act as much the ignorant slut as she finds comforting; someone will do something compellingly sane to make up for it.

Perhaps you can come up with one or two. Give it a try. It's fun!